"If I met you in real life…" finish it in my ass Aug 21st / Tagged: wait oh god / 150,832 notes †
Aug 21st / 25,340 notes †

and-id-marry-larry:

meliapond:

blainetabulous:

If you can’t handle me randomly blurting out song lyrics that relate to what you just said, we can’t be friends

why can’t we be friends why can’t we be frieeeendds

we can definitely be friends

Aug 21st / 234,044 notes †

keeppthevibe:

I might be too young to settle down and marry, but I’m definitely too old to be playing anymore games. I’m too old to just be talking to someone, too old to not know what’s really going on, and too old to be entertaining somebody with no intentions of making it work. At this age, I’m only interested in consistency, stability, respect and loyalty. And I want to hear someone tell me that they love me and know they goddam mean it.

Aug 21st / 12,032 notes †
fuckyeahretailrobin:

Today we didn’t have any carbonation for the soft drinks so there were two pieces of paper taped over the soda fountains saying that they were out of order. I saw this one man completely disregard the signs and try to get pop out of the fountain anyway. He even lifted up one of the signs as he was trying to get his drink. Uh, that sign is there for a reason, son. 

The host station is IN the restaurant! I sell t shirts! Fucking read the goddamn signs people.This is one of the most infuriating things.

fuckyeahretailrobin:

Today we didn’t have any carbonation for the soft drinks so there were two pieces of paper taped over the soda fountains saying that they were out of order. I saw this one man completely disregard the signs and try to get pop out of the fountain anyway. He even lifted up one of the signs as he was trying to get his drink. Uh, that sign is there for a reason, son. 

The host station is IN the restaurant! I sell t shirts! Fucking read the goddamn signs people.

This is one of the most infuriating things.

Aug 21st / 104 notes †

jokesmymomwouldlike:

are you ever just like “lol white people” but then you’re like “wait i am a white people”

Aug 21st / 158,082 notes †
Just want a girl down to chill for the day and do nothing but smoke, eat pizza, and watch movies while talking about all our weird secrets. Mark Patterson (via kushandwizdom) Aug 21st / 1,882 notes †

mofobian:

shreddingruen:

queer-kid:

Your girlfriend should never feel like she’s in competition with any other girl.

#YourBoyfriendShould’ntEither

Nah. If you feel like you’re competing just let it go. I assume if someone else is more deserving of her attention then that’s where her heart is. I’m not gonna compete or play that jealousy shit.

Aug 21st / 53 notes †
  • me: damn i need to save my money
  • me: *spends $200 in a week*
Aug 21st / 108,703 notes †

professional-bird:

CAN WE JUST TALK ABOUT THE FACT THAT POPE FRANCIS IS SO FRIKKIN CHILL THAT IF AN ALIEN WALKED IN TO THE VATICAN HE WOULDN’T EVEN FREAK OUT HE’D JUST BE LIKE “SUP DUDE LETS GO GET YA SOME JESUS” 

I respect this pope so fucking much.

Aug 21st / 159,016 notes †

golgibodies:

if my ceiling fan spun off it’s track and cut my head off i’d be okay with it

Aug 20th / 44 notes †

Marvel’s Chris trifecta

Aug 20th / 73,516 notes †
fakedean:

I don’t know anything about Night Vale but this is beautiful

fakedean:

I don’t know anything about Night Vale but this is beautiful

Aug 20th / 195,199 notes †
Aug 20th / 19,106 notes †
Aug 20th / Tagged: werewolfsympathy / 37,240 notes †

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